Acceptance!

I accepted that I lost my camera,

Stolen or lost, it's no longer mine!



I have accepted Anita's going away,

Until she serves her time!



I have accepted the life of karma,

Bringing love & peace sublime!



I have accepted accounting as my duty,

Also a mommie, wife, & friend as my chime!



Acceptance is a hard path to find,

But once trudged,

You KNOW it will be fine!



This poem may be a little elementary, but it basically sums up everything going on this past week!



I never thought that having to stand behind another family member in court would haunt me.....thought I was over that drama along time ago! Just remember, you never know till your there! THAT'S JUST IT! I DIDN'T WANT TO BE THERE! I STILL DON'T WANT TO BE HERE! I don't want to explain to 4 year old Gwen why grandma Scarim isn't here on Christmas, Easter, her birthday, year after year till she's out! I DON'T WANT TO! I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO! CAN'T I JUST AVOID IT ALL TOGETHER? ( if you have no clue why, and want to know, just research Scarim on Google, you will get the answers from the Verde independent). I just don't feel like telling the story.



How long do I wait? How long do I prancy foot around the "where's grandma" question? Till she's 6 and can understand that just because grandma did a REALLY bad thing, that doesn't make her a bad person? How about...... NOT AT ALL!



Anxiety, tell me it's not rising in your chest the thought of it! I need an answer pill! I have been praying......god keeps telling me that this WILL be OK......this will all get better with time......Gwen is a strong soul, she can take this.......I just don't know if I can. The tears swell up and the chest gets heavy......anxiety!



I will stay strong for my family! I have done this before, with WORSE circumstances, I can deal with this now! I will accept the good, I WILL accept the bad! I will accept the mediocre, I will accept this challenge in stride, I WILL stop crying (when I get done writing about it), I WILL stand strong enough for both me and Matt.....and we WILL ACCEPT THAT THINGS WILL BE ALRIGHT!



To make it alright, I'll list EVERYTHING GOOD in September.......

Gwendalyn received student of the month, she had no clue that she was getting a reward, but she liked hearing her name at flag ceremony......was SSSOOOOO shocked to see me standing there she just stood there even after they were told to sit down now:) The picture is her singing her ABC song at flag ceremony! She is blooming so much now, it's amazing!



Next, Matthew and I celebrated 6 years of being married! We finally got to do something fun besides dinner in Payson! We attended a Santana concert! I was blown away! It was the MOST fun I have had for 50 dollars in my whole life!

We have TWINS! Pumpkins that is:) Hopefully it's in the water.....that would be nice! But seriously....we have pumpkins growing out front with two on one vine! They are partially connected....Siamese twins:)

We got our phone & roof fixed! Yea! This was a long time coming......we have a new phone number due to Qwest offering to fix the phone line for less if we connected a new number, along with GREAT Internet incentives! If you need our new number email me and I will get it to you!

And last, but not least, I have lost 4 pounds! Only 40 more to go and I will be content!